Browsing Category

Inspiration

Inspiration

Cheers To The New Year!

19th January 2024 and the first blog of the year. Happy New Year dear reader!

My prayer is that we are all in good health and high spirits as we embark on the exciting journey that the New Year brings. 2024 is still young and fresh, full of hope and excitement of what it brings forth for us. The year still smells of its newness (for some of us, lol) with goals, dreams, hopes and desires for a fruitful, productive and prosperous year. Day 19 and am still super excited for the New Year; I’m super excited to see what God has in store for me.

Late in 2022 before crossing over to 2023, I was in a season of prayer and God gave me His word that He is opening a door and much would begin to shift through this new space, a dimension of change and He was unlocking my purpose and especially in my gifting’s and potential. At that point I really couldn’t pinpoint what God had in store or more accurately I wasn’t spiritually mature enough (then, lol) to exactly discern it, all I had was a deep gut conviction in my spirit. So when crossing over to 2023, I was certain that I was not just physically crossing into a new year but it was a change of season, the end of closed doors and the dawn of a new era of open doors. I knew that God was leading me to right where He needed me to be.

True to it, 2023, the Lord gifted me this burning hunger and desire for Him and I pursued Him with all of my heart. I did not just read my bible, I studied it and meditated on His word. I became more intentional in the gathering of believers and attended as many nurturing fellowships as I could where we talked, shared and spent time reading the word, praying and holding each other accountable to ensure we were all growing deep in God. I devoted my time and gifts to serving in the marriage ministry in my church where we walked with couples desiring to set God as the foundation of the marriages. I spent time listening and studying sermons of men and women of God as the Spirit would lead and guide me. I wasn’t seeking Him for what I could get in return, nope, I just wanted Him.I had my deskie ask me one day at work ‘apart from church stuff, what else do you do?’ lol. The core of my being was entirely devoted to seeking God and growing in and with Him, the rest didn’t matter as much to me.

James 4:8–10 writes, Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.

I have truly walked in the fullness of that word. As I grew more intimate with Him, He began to reveal Himself more to me and also reveal my identity and the fullness of it in Him. I grew more grounded and confident of who I am in Him and the limitless power I carry as the child of God and His chosen vessel. I grew out of being bothered/triggered by small weightless things, I was less anxious about what was/is to come because I was now walking in light, in knowledge and in revelation. He gave me dreams, visions and a Rhema word of His perfect will for my life and I was walking and resting in assurance.

I am simply, truly and deeply overwhelmed by God’s doing. He is Ebenezer and faithful to His word; none of His word falls to the ground. 2023 was the year of open doors and I saw God move in my life, not only for me but also for my family. We saw God move in ways that only He could; we dwelt more in His presence, we walked in favor, provision and protection, we experienced His healing, the list is simply endless. I have loads of testimonies: in summary it was a God Year and He showed up and showed off lavishly.

Most of us know God as a father, healer, provider but He is also a rewarder, the rewarder of men. My core verse was “And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek him. Hebrews 11:6

2024 without a doubt I am confidently assured that I am still walking in the blessing of that new season because when God opens a door, NO MAN can shut it.

“These are the words of Him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What He opens no one can shut, and what He shuts no one can open. I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.” Revelation 3:7-8

This explains my excitement for 2024 because I have tasted and seen that the Lord is incredibly amazing and I am looking forward to growing in more intimacy with Him, to walking into more open doors and to be lavished by His overwhelmingly great and exceeding rewards.

This is my prayer for you as well:

I pray that as you have begun the year, you will anchor yourself on the rock who is CHRIST, the only firm foundation, the rest are sinking sand.

I pray that as you are excitedly planning and setting goals, that God will be a priority and He will find room in your hearts and your lives.

I pray that you will desire to know Him more starting from right where you because you are never far away, all you need is to turn back and He will meet you there.

I pray that you will experience God in a way that you never have and in doing so, you will experience freedom from every captivity, chains and strongholds that have been holding you back.

I pray that you will find your freedom in Christ alone because He paid for it ALL.

I pray that you will come to the full understanding of how much God deeply loves you and that nothing you have done/ will do can separate you from His love.

I pray that you will prosper concerning all things and to be in good health, just as your soul prospers.

I pray that God will shake off every foundation, connection and relationship that is not of Him as He anchors you on His will.

I pray that God will make you lie upon lush pastures and He will lead you by restful waters.

Above all, I pray that you will distinctively know His voice as you walk in obedience to Him.

So here is a toast to the New Year!!

Cheers to learning and growing together as the Lord leads us.

Amen!

Inspiration

Be Led!

Welcome back home my dear reader! Last we were here was 30th June 2023: this walk of faith is turning out to be a stroll lol, Lord forgive me!

Towards the end of October I did a little soul searching and decided to make a few changes for the remaining days of 2023; a little motivation to ensure I end the year impactful and set the tone for 2024. One of the things I challenged myself to do was publish a blog post every week and so here I am being faithful in the small things. Can you believe that the year is almost coming to an end? Today, the 10th day of November is day 314 out of 365, exactly 51 days left to the cross over, truly God has been gracious and faithful to us.

Last year a time like this, the older version of myself would have been in a state of panic and anxiety thinking to herself, “oh my goodness, the year is ending. What have I done with myself? What have I done with my life? Where am I going? Am I living purposefully?” Oh how I remember her too well she was something special, lol.

There are moments I struggled in 2022 and I was trusting God to end those seasons and usher me to a new level. Outcomes of these moments was I stopped serving both in church and in my personal space, I wasn’t as fervent in my prayers, fasting, and devotions. I wasn’t writing my goals, blogging, dreaming and chasing goals. I just lived, small and settled and I was exhausted mentally, emotionally and spiritually (more of it here https://mywalkoffaith.co.ke/ebenezer/).

I remember when I crossed over into 2023, deep in my spirit I knew it was not just a physical crossing into a new year but it was a change of season: the end of closed doors and the dawn of a new era of open doors. And true to it, I am deeply overwhelmed by God’s doing in my life these past 10 months, He is Ebenezer and faithful to His word. This 2023 version of myself is different: she’s not feeling alone, struggling in a storm, battling feelings of doubt, insecurities and stagnation. She’s more settled and grounded in God, she’s more aligned spiritually and is discerning to understand the times and seasons by the grace of God. She has solidified her identity in Christ and isn’t wavered by small waves of life as she has learned to lift her eyes unto Jesus, the author and finisher of her faith. She’s living her life authentically, boldly and unashamed knowing the only validation she needs is His. She’s serving in church and in her personal space as she disciples those God brings her way. She’s no longer struggling to pray: the dying embers have been fully flamed and this girl is on fire for Christ.

I have now come to fully believe that when we seek God diligently, He rewards us with His presence and so much more. “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek him.” Hebrews 11:6

I am a living testimony, I have seen His hand in my life and I am in awe of what a surrendered vessel can become in His hands. All it needed was me letting go of the reins on my life and letting God lead the way because it dawned on me that the root cause of my struggles were anchored in my innate desire for self-control. All this time spent fighting God for the control was just wasted years because my life isn’t my own to lead, more so when I surrendered to Christ and allowed Him to be the Lord of my life. Prophet Jeremiah in his book, chapter 10.23 states that so well “Lord I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps”. I wonder why I was I hell-bent on living my life on my turf like I was the “lord” and yet I was just a little smurf (yea, big animation fan).

But doom to you who fight your Maker – you’re a pot at odds with the potter! Does clay talk back to the potter: ‘What are you doing? What clumsy fingers!’ Isaiah 45:9(Message version)

Why do we struggle with leading ourselves yet we are limited as mankind? If only we knew, understood and believed that God’s plan for our lives is grand beyond our wildest imaginations, then we wouldn’t be struggling to get off the driver’s seat and let Him drive us to our destiny. Before we were formed in our mother’s wombs, God knew us and before we were born, He had already predestined us for greatness. His plans are to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future. As mankind, we are yet to witness a fraction of what God has in store for us, period! All we have experienced is just but a glimpse of the His magnificent will for us. It is written in 1 Cor. 2:9 “No eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the human heart conceived, what God has prepared for those who love Him.”

Beloved, don’t box God!

Don’t box Him in comparison to what you think you need or want. You only end up grossly limiting Him to your own thoughts which are way lower than His. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9. Your needs/wants are so basic to what God has in store for you, it’s like a child asking the dad to buy them a teddy bear because in their mind that’s the biggest need and yet the dad can provide so much more than that.

Don’t box Him in comparison to what He has already done for you. You only end grossly limiting Him to one template yet He can do exceedingly abundantly above what you think or imagine. God is the same yesterday today and forever more BUT His methods are not the always the same. Some battles you will strike the Red Sea with your rod, some you will wade in the Jordan River. Some battles you will strike out the enemy with your swords and some you will walk around Jericho for 7 days for your victory. Some miracles He will only speak a word and your sight will be restored and some miracles He will spit the ground, mix his saliva with dirt, make mud and apply the paste your eyes. Don’t use the victories of yesterday as a strategy for today’s battles.

Don’t box Him to your timelines. All the days ordained for us were written in His book before one of them came to be. God is never late, God is never early; God is always on time: He works in His ordained and appointed time. We are the ones who are always in a hurry when we want it done on our terms in our own timing, then when it doesn’t happen, we cry out there is a delay. But is it ever a delay if from the word go we didn’t know of the exact timing of the occurrence? Who should dictate what entails a delay? Us or the one who creates the time and the timings? I believe until we know the expected time of arrival, then we really can’t tell if there is a delay, that can only be God’s job and we must strive to leave it in His hands.

If there is a core lesson for me in 2023 is the gentle reminder that we are just but vessels in the hand of our maker, we are like sheep in the fold of our good Shepherd. Our job isn’t to know where we are going, nope. That’s the Shepherd’s job and He does such an amazing job at it. Our job as His sheep is to simply know God’s voice and to walk in total obedience. The Psalmist in chapter 37 stated that “The steps of a righteous man are ordered/directed and established by the Lord”

Our job as His sheep is to rest in the words of Psalms 23:

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He knows all your needs and wants, He is Jehovah Jireh, your provider.

He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters.
He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.

All we are called to do is to allow the Shepherd to take the lead. Even in the days when we can’t tell where we are going and it seems all dark, we are called to not fear.

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Even in the face of opposition when we feel we are hard-pressed in all corners and we are surrounded and outnumbered, we are called to rest in the assurance that He is the master orchestrator and all things work together for good.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

So today, do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the Kingdom: rest in that assurance. Surrender to His leading, purpose to draw near to Him and He will draw near to you. Walk intimately with Him, know His voice and follow His leading.

And surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Let go and Let God lead you.

In whatever you do, wherever you may be, place your hand in His, be His faithful follower and let God’s hand lead you and you’ll be surprised at what God will do!

AMEN!

Inspiration Motivation Second Chances

EBENEZER!

30th June 2023, the last day of the sixth month of 2023! To God be the glory and the honour for this far He has brought us, carried us and sustained us. Where would we be were it not for His mercies and grace? If the LORD had not been on our side— let Israel say— if the LORD had not been on our side when people attacked us, they would have swallowed us alive when their anger flared against us; the flood would have engulfed us, the torrent would have swept over us, the raging waters would have swept us away. Praise be to the LORD, who has not let us be torn by their teeth. We have escaped like a bird from the fowler’s snare; the snare has been broken, and we have escaped. Our help is in the name of the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. Psalms 124:1-8.

As I write this, my heart is overflowing with immense gratitude because God has been faithful and there are so many miracles: little, big (and everything in between) that we can all count and attest that God has been truly faithful. For starters being alive is a big testimony. Every day I watch the news there is always a grisly story of an accident or incident claiming the lives of people. But we are here and we are alive. Not because of anything special we have done or any claim of our holiness or righteousness, it’s by just by His grace and mercy. There are so many who lost their lives battling illness and serious medical conditions, but we are here and we are alive. There are so many who were involved in road accidents and lost their loved ones, yet we are here and we are alive, never been in an accident/survived one/ saved from one. Believe me, there are so many battles that God fights for us behind the scenes without our knowledge.

So can we just take a minute to reflect on the goodness of God and say Thank you Jesus!

From the rising of the sun to the setting of the same, the name of the LORD is to be praised. Psalm 113

At the onset of 2023, I was elated and it was not your usual New Year excitement, nope, it was more than that. It was more profound, there was a deeper spiritual meaning to my excitement. Back in 2022, a bigger part of the last quarter of the year from September I started feeling restless, like there was more I could/should have been doing with my life but I wasn’t. I started looking back at my life and looking for big milestones that in my mind I thought I should have achieved by then but there were nowhere in my list of accomplishments. I will be honest to admit that this is not a beautiful space to be mentally, spiritually, emotionally or even socially. I started demeaning the journey of where I had come from and where I was at that point because I was not seeing anything good about the process.

I started feeling that some blessings had taken too long to come to fruition. I started basing my value and worth on the things I had hoped to accomplish by a certain age and because I wasn’t seeing them, I got into a space of anxiety and hopelessness paired with despair. I started gradually pulling away from the things of God, things that I loved, blogging, journaling, devotions…and even when I did those things, it was more of lamentations, lol. I was carrying this heavy weighted cloud of gloom and sadness with me, feeling like a total failure and disappointment to God and to myself. Looking back at the entries in my journal then and weeeeeh!! I was spiraling into a dark place. Below is an excerpt from 23/11/22:

Lord, I am struggling. I feel am stuck, stagnated. I should be doing so much but am so little. Am not disciplined, not dreaming, not exploring my potential, not pushing myself. Am settling for less, for comfort. Like I know what I should be doing but I don’t and I sit and envy people who are doing their best. What’s wrong with me? Why am I comfortable with little? Shock me. I need an awakening, a revival. I know you have grand plans for me. How do I move from here to there? I have dreams, Rhema word, passions and desires but my life isn’t reflecting it. Why? Am I in the process? Am I keeping you waiting? What do I need to do? Where do I need to be? Who do I need to be?  I don’t like this feeling. I need a difference. Am not fasting, not praying, not doing my devotions. journaling, blogging or serving. I am incompetent. I am limited, grossly.

Another excerpt from 6/12/22:

I look at the gap between 2020 and 2022 and clearly I have stagnated. I look at who I was in 2018/2019 and who I am now and there is a total difference. I stopped serving, praying fervently, fasting, devotions, writing my goals, blogging, dreaming, chasing goals. I just lived, small and settled, content, did not stretch. I survived. I don’t like this lazy uninspired version of me. Of all the great potential God has placed in me, I shouldn’t be content in been small, little, insignificant. I need to awake the giant in me. What happened? I need fresh fire, revival, anointing

When it rains, it pours and that’s exactly how I was feeling and struggling with, alone in a storm.  I knew who I am in Christ, where I am from, with God being my source. I knew why am here, what I can do and where I am going. But I just couldn’t figure out how to get unstuck from where I was. People say showing weakness is a sign of strength, but I think it’s not weakness, it’s vulnerability and to admit to the fact that you are vulnerable is a form of courage that challenges you to step up to deal with that problem. It isn’t a façade that I am invulnerable, no one is invulnerable. Am glad that Jesus loves taking messes and transforming them into masterpiece and that He never says ‘’this is the last time I am putting you back together”.

All through September to November 2022, I was wallowing in and out of that sad state but one thing was constant, I kept crying out to God asking Him to awaken me, revive me, touch me once more, and say another word that would fire me back to momentum. Let me tell you guys, God is super faithful. He sees all our cries, hears all our prayers and answers according to His will for us in the Kingdom. Mid November my sister invited me to join this weekly online fellowship she had been attending for a while since October and it was where God was directing her to settle as a home church. For a while I was reluctant but eventually I warmed up to the idea and attended one or two services before God connected me to the man of God who has obtained the grace from God. Our very first interaction, He made a declaration over my life:  that there was a space that I wanted to step into and I have been hoping that the Lord will quicken me to it but it seems long overdue. That the Lord is opening that door and I would walk in that space pretty soon and much would begin to shift through this new space,  a dimension of change and the Lord is unlocking my purpose and especially in my gifting’s and potential.

To say I was elated is an understatement, I cried my heart out because after a long while, I felt heard and seen by God and it was pure love washing me all over again. And true to God’s word, which never goes back in vain and always fulfils the purpose it was sent to accomplish, the Lord turned my situation around to the glory and honour of His name. December was marked by so many testimonies of His faithfulness ranging from family to work to ministry. When I crossed over into 2023, deep in my spirit I knew it was not just a physical crossing into a new year but it was a change of season: the end of closed doors and the dawn of a new era of open doors. 30th June 2023 and I am truly overwhelmed by God’s doing in my life in these 6 months, God has just been showing up and showing off on me.

I have seen the hand of God in my life and He has revived me and awakened the fire back on the altar. Am back to serving in church, the marriage ministry where has called us to be a light amidst the current darkness in this institution. My passions and dreams have been revived and am actively working on pursuing them from a Kingdom agenda. God has slowly disconnected me from relationships that were not aligned to Him and in return He has restored some divine relationships I had walked away from and connected me with new divine strategic relationships where we are all pursuing God together and keeping the fire of God burning amidst. Am back to journaling, dreaming, visions, fire for the word, am witnessing revival all around me, in my family and spaces. The list is so endless, I lack words: talk of divine favor, divine strategic connections and relationships, restoration, endless blessings and above all His Grace that carries me. Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, “Thus far the Lord has helped us! 1 Samuel 7:12

All those feelings of restlessness, stagnation etc., He has/continues to deal with them and now I understand am on a journey to the glorious vision He showed me when I surrendered to him and accepted Him as my personal saviour and friend. I have come to understand that God will show you your vision but never tell you how to get there and there is a reason why. The vision is a glimpse of the end but there is a space between the end and where you are currently, that space is called the plan. The plan is the process that takes you to your destination. God will tell you your end like he showed Joseph in the dreams, the throne, the power with his brothers bowing doing to him. We all have dreams; we all have our end that He has revealed to us but God never tells us the plan because chances are we might tell Him to forget about the destination. If Joseph knew the pit and the prison was to come before the throne, he might have said forget about the throne. The plan is God’s secret. The plan is to prepare us for the destination so He takes us through all these phases to prepare and develop us.

So today am here to encourage you in the Lord, to urge you to put your trust in God even in the situations when what He has spoken don’t mirror your current situation. Any time you face a setback or the enemy sneaks in and whispers his deception, may you be encouraged that it is all part of the plan. Don’t panic, even your mistakes He will conform them to fulfil the purpose. Right now where you are may not be where you want to but it’s all part of the plan. God is working on character development, patience development, vision development etc. God is preparing you for what He has prepared for you.

God is faithful!

Inspiration Motivation

Not Yet Child!

Our second blog post of the month/year and I believe it calls for applause because a win is a win, whether big or small and it should be celebrated lol. I haven’t written in a while but it feels amazing to be back here.

This past week I have been reading and meditating on the book of Luke and despite having read it before, am always in awe of how the Holy Spirit teaches and brings out new revelation each and every time. Indeed the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12.

Luke chapter 1 begins by giving us the story of Zechariah and Elizabeth who were both from a priestly lineage and loved the Lord wholeheartedly, devoting their entire lives to serving Him. They were commended as righteous in the sight of God, observing all the Lord’s commands and decrees blamelessly. But they were childless because Elizabeth was not able to conceive, and they were both very old.

Serving God does not equate to a life free of pain, sorrow, trials and tests. To think that God owes you a smooth sailing ride because you are living in obedience to Him is a wrong mind-set that robs from your walk of faith. Every Christian in the salvation journey will undergo the baptism of the sufferings of Christ and this season is inevitable because it has its purpose. Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything James 1:2-4. In the midst of it all, our greatest consolation is that we don’t walk alone because we have the assurance that in the storms, God is with us, watching us, ordering our steps and carrying us. And after we have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called us to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish us” (1 Peter 5:10).

Despite Zechariah and Elizabeth being childless, they never stopped seeking, praying and most importantly they never stopped serving God. As a matter of fact, their long life prayer was answered while Zechariah was in the middle of service. This is such an encouragement to never stop serving and seeking God even in those times when we think/feel we are alone and He is not answering our prayers. Salvation is a beautiful, exhilarating and life changing journey but truth be told it’s not always glitz and glam. It has its hills and valleys moment. Moments you’re on the mountain top celebrating victories and testimonies and answered prayers: the highlights of your walk of faith. Then the other moments when you’re deep in the valleys, drowning in fear, battling unbelief and fighting raging wars within your spirit and your environment.

Moments you’ll pray fervently for certain requests and some will be answered almost immediately with joy and thanksgiving but some will take years and years of still praying, still hoping, still believing and still holding onto the faith. In such moments, we are called to never take our eyes away from Jesus because at His appointed time, He makes all things beautiful. And as rightly put in Habakkuk 2:3 for the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.

And true to God’s word and timing, God answered Zechariah and Elizabeth, “Do not be afraid, Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John. After hearing God’s word, the answer to their prayers, you would expect that Zechariah’s reaction would be one of joy and pure bliss, elated and over the moon for hearing the words he had literally waited all his life for. But sadly the first words that come from his mouth were filled with doubt and unbelief. Zechariah asked the angel, “How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.” This reminds me the incident in Acts 12: 5-17 when Peter had been arrested to be executed the following day so the believers gathered together to fervently intercede for his release and God intervened and sent an angel to set him free. The first stop he made was at the house where they had gathered to pray for him. When this had dawned on him, he went to the house of Mary the mother of John, also called Mark, where many people had gathered and were praying. 13 Peter knocked at the outer entrance, and a servant named Rhoda came to answer the door. 14 When she recognized Peter’s voice, she was so overjoyed she ran back without opening it and exclaimed, “Peter is at the door!”15 “You’re out of your mind,” they told her. When she kept insisting that it was so, they said, “It must be his angel.”16 But Peter kept on knocking, and when they opened the door and saw him, they were astonished.

Why did they disregard Rhoda’s statement? Why did they think it was his angel? Why were they astonished? I think simply put, they prayed but didn’t have the faith that it would be answered. And that’s how most of us play out in our journey of faith especially in the moments we have prayed continuously for a season but the answer has not been delivered. After a while something in us changes and it starts to feel like we are praying to tick a box but deep down, the doubt has been rooted in our hearts and minds.

The bible is very explicit that whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Truly I tell you,” Jesus replied, “if you have faith and do not doubt, not only will you do what was done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen. 22 If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.” There is no room for doubt in a believer’s life because it has its consequences. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. . Oh Lord that you would help our unbelief.

Due to Zechariah’s unbelief, he was muted and was unable to speak until the birth of his child, possibly 9 long months of silence and observing the miracle of God slowly manifesting in front of his eyes. He was only able to speak when he came in agreement with the word of God concerning his testimony as he named his child. Immediately his mouth was opened and his tongue set free, and he began to speak, praising God. All the neighbors were filled with awe, and throughout the hill country of Judea people were talking about all these things. 66 Everyone who heard this wondered about it, asking, “What then is this child going to be?” For the Lord’s hand was with him.

There is no greater honor than God choosing to reveal His glory through His servants who are willing to be used by Him. Sure it doesn’t come easy, the wait will be heart wrenching, the voices of doubt will be screaming out loud and the mocking of the crowds will be heightened. But if you hold still, anchored on God and the credibility of His word which never fails and never returns void, in the end you will come out with such a testimony that will astonish everyone around you.

Trusting in God sometimes looks like foolishness in the eyes of man because He chooses things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And He chooses things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. (1 Corinthians 1:27). Noah looked like a fool when he built the ark and he was mocked and ridiculed but he kept his faith knowing and trusting in who had spoken to him. In the end, all the scoffers and mockers drowned in the very thing they mocked him for. Abraham left his family and all he knew to follow the voice of an unknown God, into an unknown territory and I can imagine how his family members reacted to the news. Even when God told Him that He would make him a father of many nations and that his descendants would be as numerous as the stars, in his old age, he believed the Lord, and it was credited it to him as righteousness.

Zechariah and Elizabeth were old and barren but by the power of God they conceived and gave birth. The Lord did it for them, showed them His favor and took away their disgrace among the people. And in the end, they all had songs to testify and glorify God for the great work He had done through them. Not only were they given a son, but they were given such an extraordinary son 14 He will be a joy and delight to you, and many will rejoice because of his birth, 15 for he will be great in the sight of the Lord. He is never to take wine or other fermented drink, and he will be filled with the Holy Spirit even before he is born. 16 He will bring back many of the people of Israel to the Lord their God. 17 And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous—to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.”.

John grew, became strong in the Spirit and he lived such a radical life in pursuit of his purpose. He was the voice of one calling in the wilderness nudging people to prepare the way for the Lord. He went into all the country around the Jordan, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sin and he heralded the Messiah. The people were amazed at his deeds but most importantly, he received the highest accolade when Jesus testified about him as the greatest. Truly I tell you, among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet whoever is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he. Matthew 11:11.

Am here to encourage you beloved, do not doubt God, do not doubt His word and most certainly do not doubt His power and ability. Nothing is impossible with God: if He has said it, He will most definitely do it. Before we were formed in our mother’s wombs, God knew us. All the days ordained for us were written in His book before one of them came to be. God is never late, God is never early; God is always on time: He works in His ordained and appointed time. We are the ones who are always in a hurry when we want it done on our terms in our own timing, then when it doesn’t happen, we cry out there is a delay. But is it ever a delay if from the word go we didn’t know of the exact timing of the occurrence? Who should dictate what entails a delay? Us or the one who creates the time and the timings? I believe until we know the expected time of arrival, then we really can’t tell if there is a delay, that can only be God’s job and we must strive to leave it in His hands.

As I write this am also preaching to myself because severally I have cried to God and lamented at Him for the supposedly delay in answering some prayers, I too like Zechariah and Elizabeth know the pain of waiting to hold a testimony. But our God is so gracious because He knows how to wipe our tears and soothe us even in the waiting season.

And to you who is also waiting, for a job, a promotion, hand in marriage, salvation for your loved ones, healing from the loss of a loved one, breakthroughs in any area…the list is long and endless, this is my prayer for you: May you be found walking in obedience to God and His word. At His appointed time, may your results speak for you, louder than your own voice because there is a sermon only results can preach. May you never tire of laboring in prayer and the word until you get your results. As you wait, may you never live a powerless barren Christian life but may your life command super extraordinary results. In the name of Jesus. Amen!

Inspiration Motivation Second Chances

Still We Rise!

The first blog post of 2023.

                                                                               {A moment of silence}

I remember coming back here last year (https://mywalkoffaith.co.ke/the-return-of-the-prodigal/) and pouring out my heart saying how I felt extremely horrible for ghosting, letting myself, my walk of faith and my readers down. How despite the silence and not blogging for months/years, the flame never withered or died out, it was always in there, holding on to the last embers. Hope faintly burning on that one day we would get back to this ministry and that God would restore us back to penning down what He places in my heart.

                                                                                         {Sigh}

You would think that would have sparked the fire back to the full glory of its glaring blaze, you would think that the hiatus would have churned tonnes and tonnes of blogposts from the many months of absenteeism, you would think that the life experiences in between the months of silence would have overflowed into testimonies poured out here, to the glory and honor of Christ.

                                                                                      {A long sigh, lol}

I remember back in 2016 after I had been saved for a few months and I was burning for Christ. The Zoe life I had started experiencing was truly overwhelming and all I wanted to do was just scream out and share what God was doing. I wanted to tell the world of how amazing God is; how He was gracious enough to save a lil broken girl who was almost giving up on life, how He overlooked all her flaws, shortcomings and her scars & He choose her and restored her. How He shined His light upon her, comforted her of all the pain and baggage she had been carrying around, pain that she had heavily pegged her identity on. How He had bestowed on her a crown of beauty instead of ashes and she was now a living testimony of how a broken piece in the hands of the Master can be transformed to a masterpiece for the glory and honor of His name.

So I started writing and sharing my new found journey, I didn’t know much about blogging, it was a pretty new space that I dived head in and decided to trust not only the process but the God of the process. I started small, on a free site with zero audience but that never deterred the zeal, I knew I was doing what I felt led to do even on the days when the walk of faith had its slippery moments. I didn’t have the full picture of where this would lead or what would become of it, I didn’t have any expectations and even with my audience of one (God), I was just happy and content to have a space where I could pour out my heart and share what I was going through. Looking back, I miss this girl, the girl with the blind crazy childlike faith who didn’t need to wait for a clearer calling but would gladly follow the leading of the Spirit without any hesitations, reservations or interrogations.

In 2018, I got a clearer call that it was time to step into the public and launch an official blog thus https://mywalkoffaith.co.ke/ was born. I remember the excitement like it was yesterday, finally I was sharing my heart with the world and people would get a glimpse of my personal journey in salvation as I strived to follow in the footsteps of Christ. I was allowing Christ to use me as a mouthpiece to voice out what He placed in my spirit, allowing Him to use me as a vessel, to outpour His overwhelming love to His children, to bring healing to broken hearts and give hope to despairing souls. I moved from an audience of one to a platform where hundreds would be reached and impacted for His glory and I loved my ministry because as I was pouring my heart, I was also growing in my faith. I still didn’t have the bigger picture but I was happy to step in obedience and do what I was called to do for that season.

One year down the line, BAKE (Bloggers Association of Kenya) 2019 happened and I was more than humbled to say the least…truly God is amazing and super faithful. Who would have thought that three years down the line in salvation and an year into blogging, this girl would be nominated for a national award under best religious/ spiritual blog, placed in the same category as personalities I’ve grown up looking up to… But God. He qualifies the unqualified. That night I looked back at the journey it had taken to get here and I broke down in tears…years of struggling with anger, bitterness and hurt from a broken childhood that left me messed up. Years of struggling with self-esteem and self-worth, lost in a lack of identity, years of searching for my validation in the arms of the wrong men, a search that left me more hurt, broken and damaged. Years of struggling to believe that my life could be better than the situation I lived in, years of doubt that God would forgive me for my mistakes and that He, in his perfect Holiness could love a sinner like I was.

Only a Father’s pure unconditional love can reach out to the grimy, slimy pits of emptiness and hopelessness, the deep trenches of hurt and brokenness, the dark caves clouded with despair and desperation. Only a Father’s heart can feel the last desperate heartbeats of a child who’s giving up on life and show up just in the nick time. Only a Father’s eyes can see beyond the smiles and the make-up, the facades and appearances we put for people yet deep down we are sinking further into depression. And only a Father’s arms can stretch open wide to receive us in our stained attires, embrace us and give new garments of praise, new identities and make us new creations. What can’t God do?

That was 2019, the fire, the passion, the drive and the zeal was still burning furiously and I was serving the Lord wholeheartedly. Accolades or not, audience of many or one, it didn’t matter because for me the ultimate joy was in the inner work that Christ was doing in me, the scars that He had chosen to use for His glory, the vessel of clay that He had honored to be the evidence of His hand upon my life. The bigger picture and the highest calling was the impact of the blog as a ministry and the number of souls that would be saved for the glory and honor of Christ. So I kept pushing, kept writing, pouring my heart, reaching people globally. Kept churning weekly blog posts and with time it became fortnightly, then monthly then quarterly then gradually I stopped…slow fade!

                                                                                {A longer sigh, lol}

The first few days of ghosting, I felt extremely horrible for letting myself, my audience of one and my walk of faith down, then another couple of weeks down the line I felt a little less horrible and then it spiraled downwards until months turned into an year, years and I honestly no longer felt horrible, I succumbed and just became numb. It’s always a slow gradual fade, you don’t wake up in sin, nope, it’s a gradual progression. It starts small, little, almost harmless and when not nipped in time, when its fed continually, it grows and matures until finally it’s a fully blown out of hand crisis.

When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. James 1:13-15

Despite not writing for eons, I never stopped thinking about it, it was always lingering at the back of my mind like the heart tag of your first love. And it’s not to say I had fallen off the bandwagon of salvation, nope, I was still a church girl, loving the Lord, pursuing Him in my walk of faith, witnessing Him being super faithful in my life and of those around me, celebrating the numerous answered prayers He was fulfilling. The only thing I stopped doing was actively serve in ministry for three years, a season I never anticipated, a season of silence, doubts, regrets and so many emotions in between. I had loved ones who kept querying why I stopped writing and most importantly when I would get back to it and I didn’t have a valid answer to be quite honest. Maybe I stopped walking in obedience in terms of the leading of the Spirit when it came to serving, maybe I learned to rely on my own strength and not flow in His grace thus ended up burned out, maybe God answered some major prayers and I allowed the pleasures and pressures of the blessing to take the top priority and put Him in the passenger’s seat. Maybe it was a season of been hidden in training for manifestations…

I had my moments of deep, gut-wrenching anguish and regret, days where I would sit and think “what ifs”. What would have been had I kept on writing? Serving? How many souls would I have reached? If after one year of blogging I was nominated for awards, where would the journey have taken me? How much I had disappointed God? To this end, was I even deserving of a second chance?

                          For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again, Proverbs 24:16.

Enough is enough. Am done feeling mellow and all sorry for myself, lol. Am getting up from the ashes and jumping back to blogging, back to what I love doing and most importantly back to serving and walking in obedience in this ministry. I am so grateful to God for His never ending mercies and His faithfulness even in my faithlessness. I am so grateful that He never grows weary of picking me up and getting me back on track. I am so grateful that He never grows impatient with this living sacrifice that keeps crawling away from the altar.

Do I know how this will play out? No. Will I start and fall again into silence? I don’t know. Will I be consistent? I know I will try but am such a wretched man like Paul said in Romans 7:15 for what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. What I do know is I am a carrier of the glory of God through Christ Jesus and He never fails so I will anchor myself on Him and Him alone. I know am weak and my weaknesses are perfect for Him.  As Charles Spurgeon once said in a sermon, “God does not need your strength: He has more than enough power of his own. He asks your weakness: He has none of that Himself, and He is longing, therefore, to take your weakness, and use it as the instrument in His own mighty hand. So I will yield my weakness to Him, and receive His strength.

I refuse to continue living thinking I’ve blown God’s will for my life because clearly am not that powerful. Jesus loves taking messes and transforming them into priceless rubies. I don’t have it all together and I can’t wait to tell the world how much of a mess I was/am and show them what the power of God can do, all for His glory and honor.

So let’s get back to blogging and sharing about this amazing journey of faith, this beautiful love story of a girl and her God, shall we?

And if you are out there feeling like you missed out on a certain season or gone through an intense one that almost broke you to the point you have written yourself off, don’t be discouraged. Like John Piper once said, occasionally weep deeply over the life that you hoped would be. Grieve the losses. Feel the pain. Then wash your face, trust God, and embrace the life that He’s given you. Don’t let that season you missed/lived through define you, let God have the final say in your life.

No matter what life throws at us, we refuse to lay down defeated and cowering in shame and pain and guilt, we let it hit us and then STILL WE RISE!!

Inspiration

YES I CALLED

Tis the second Friday of June and our second blog post of the month/year and I believe it calls for applause because a win is a win, whether big or small and it needs to be celebrated lol. I haven’t written in a while but it feels amazing to be back here, as shared in last week’s The Return of the Prodigal. 16 months of silence, yep BUT who is like God our restorer.

I accepted Christ as my personal savior on 26th May 2016 and last month I celebrated 6 years of God’s faithfulness in this beautiful walk of faith. I would never take any credit for this far I have come because I am utterly NOTHING without God. I haven’t played any huge or grandeur role, I have just being a vessel that surrendered and submitted to Christ for Him to use as He pleases. Have I been the most pleasant vessel to work with? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I am so flawed, too flawed, I am broken, I am stubborn, I am strong willed and led to easily disobey; simply put I am a beautiful mess of imperfection. If I didn’t know God, I would pray for Him every day that He gets the strength to work with this girl BUT because I Know Him, I pray to Him every day thanking Him for never quitting on her.

Before I got born again, I had been really struggling to live a righteous life. I knew about God since I had heard of him all throughout my life from childhood. I loved Sunday school, I loved being and serving in church as a young girl, I loved reading and hearing the bible stories of great men, women and even children who were loved by God and whose lives sounded pretty amazing. Stories of Abraham being called by the unseen and into the unknown , Noah building an ark and the rains pouring incessantly, Moses and the burning bush (I have got questions saved up to ask him when we meet in Heaven) and not forgetting little David and his five smooth stones killing a barbaric giant. These were pretty fascinating stories to me and I grew up loving God and wanting to live a life that pleased Him. But it honestly wasn’t easy as ABC. The more I grew up, the harder it became because the “giants” kept growing and morphing into different challenges: from wanting to obey and please my parents in primary to fighting peer pressure and low self-esteem in high school and finally succumbing to the worldly pleasures afterwards.

Throughout the seasons I never stopped believing that God loved me so I kept fighting the battles and I never let go of the hope that one day there would be victory over the flesh and its desires. Looking back now it’s hilarious because I would go to church every Sunday (Yes I rarely missed church, regardless of which hole I was in the previous night) be deeply convicted and ‘give’ my life to Christ then the moment I walked out and stepped back to the norm, I would come crumbling down almost instant. Some Sundays it would be going back to break up with a boyfriend and walking out having ‘made out’ for breaking up then moving on with the relationship lol. Some other Sundays it would be getting back home after the sermon then receiving a “I am out here, come meet me” kind of calls then forgetting all the resolve and jumping back into the bandwagon of drinking and making merry. Like I said, I was a beautiful mess of imperfection.

But I never stopped believing, fighting, hoping and praying to live a life that pleased God even when it spiraled downwards and became so bad and heartbreaking, even when I made terrible decisions, one after another after another until it became a cycle of bad decisions. It always felt like living a double life, on one hand I was totally sucked into this self-centered, self-pleasing self-glorifying and self-gratifying life and on the other hand I was still desperately hoping and fighting to live a righteous life because deep down my heart there was always a strong conviction of God.

The conviction never wavered but kept getting louder and louder every day until one day His voice was the loudest amidst the chaos, the struggles, the brokenness, the lies of the enemy and the depression. It kept getting louder until finally it was only Him and I alone, He saw the broken girl, her mistakes, her terrible decisions, her cries, tears and snort, her scars and wounds. He saw her at her weakest, her lowest, and her breaking point of giving up on life AND HE LOVED HER NONETHELESS.

And for the first time in my life, I felt His pure beautiful unconditional love wash over me, I felt Him lift the burden of sin I had carried all my life alongside the baggage it brought. For the very first time in my life, that night of 26th May 2016 I was redeemed, I was accepted and made new, the dead was buried and I was resurrected with Christ. My mind and body which had hosted oh so many was sanctified into His Holy Temple and I was sealed with the mark of the Holy Spirit and free to start afresh.

If I tell you what Jesus has done for me, you will never be astonished at my never ending praises unto Him. If I tell you where I have been and what I did and what He has done for me, you will never question why am completely in love and in awe of this Savior of mine. I have stared at death with my very own eyes and I have also witnessed the mighty hand of God snatch me away from the enemy’s grasp. I have slept with the enemy in his own bed and I also know what it feels like to lay on my Savior’s bosom, to be held and hidden in His arms. What God has done for me I could never repay Him, I am truly surrendered to Him, my heart belongs to Him, my life I now live for Him because His life was given up for mine.

6 years of living for Christ and it still feels like yesterday when I finally evolved from knowing about God to truly Knowing God because all my life I had heard about Him but it took one night of surrender to encounter Jesus Christ. And am still as in love with Him as I was when we first met. I still feel am yet to fully comprehend the magnitude of His love and His presence, the magnitude of His persona because even to date, there are uncountable instances where, like the Beautiful Lover He is, He keeps me on my toes and He blows my mind. No eye has seen, nor ear heard, not human heart conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him. 1st Corinthians 2:9.

In my 16 months of silence,  I confessed I had my moments of being 100% certain, assured and totally confident in my calling then the other moments where I sunk in a sea of doubt, moments of thinking “ Am I really called? Was I called? Did I hear right or did I call myself?”

Today God affirms me that YES He called me,  I didn’t call myself, I simply couldn’t. All those years in the battlefield, I didn’t sustain myself, He did and I never gave up the fight because He never gave up on me.

I know am called because before I was formed in my mother’s womb, He knew me and He set me apart for the nations. Jeremiah 1:5

I know am called because while I was still a sinner, God sent Christ to die for me Romans 5:8

I know am called because those God foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His son Jesus Christ Romans 8:29

I know am called because it is the will of God that Christ shall lose none of all those God has given to Him John 6:39

I know am called because Christ is able to keep me from stumbling and to present me before His glorious presence without fault and with great Joy Jude 1:24

31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave Him up for us all—how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[j] 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[k] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:31-39

Dear Heavenly Father,

I thank you for reminding me that Yes I am called. I thank you that You know my needs even before I open my mouth to speak and today you have met, exceeded and surpassed my thoughts in deeds. Thank you for re-affirming me that You have a plan and purpose for me, that even in the silence and moments of doubt You will never stop whispering that I am eternally yours. May my life always be pleasing to you as I give myself as a living sacrifice. To you be the glory and honor always and in eternity.

Amen!